Farmer Jed on His 88 Acre Spread

After a long day of milking the hay and cutting the cows, farmer Jed likes to head on out to the pasture and pretend he's riding at the front of the pack.

Look at that right wrist action - stretching the cable.

Jed's not messing around on his XT-500.

He lays 'er over in the berm, and feels the trials tire squirm.

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I might be getting old because I actually forgot to post an entry yesterday morning before heading off to jerk.

Hmm.

Happens to the best, I suppose.

Sounds good, so I'll go with that theory.
But, even worse than that, when I sat down last night at 10:00pm to write this, I lost my Internet connection for some flippin' reason.

So, here it is, a day late.

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You know what's really funny (or annoying, depending on what word you choose to use)?

When some meathead on a motorcycle message board writes in, asking the other members to stop what they're doing and pool all of their resources to help solve the dinwitt's dilemma that he's writing in about.

Here's an example that will illustrate the typical pinhead's mega-emergency question, complete with sucky spelling, non-existent punctuation, and shitty grammar:

PLEASE HELP!!!

Guys I have a problem with my 1998 kx125 I'm going on a ride this week end an I need to find out whats up with my bike. The oil drain plug sum how fell out when i was comin back from my friends house and now i cant shift through any of the geers what should I bee looking for the kickstart moves down do i think the top end is ok for now my friend said it could be the shift forks where are they at Please help!!! i need this bike fixed like now!

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Even more insulting than having to read through this mess, the retard will go back and forth with a couple helpful members who will actually give the sap some helpful advice, and then, POOF!, we'll never hear from him again.

And, we'll never know how his heart-stopping problem turned out.

That's just plain wrong.

My guess as to what happened?

The fool couldn't figure out how to even get the engine taken apart, sold the remains of his once-proud KX to a fellow retard for peanuts, and took up another hobby that's more to his liking and I.Q.

Something like shooting heroin.

Yeah.

That's where it's at.

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Off to jerk,

-John