111 Calories Per Mouthful

Do a Google image search for "dual purpose bike" and see what you get.

I did, and now I feel like I need a barf bag.

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Note:

If you ever wonder why the spacing of these paragraphs seems to very from day-to-day, it's because this blog website is inconsistant with how the post ends up looking once I submit it.

For today, for example, I had to add these funny dotted lines (again) in order to break the paragraphs up instead of having it displayed as one big paragraph.

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I often complain about this subject, but it's because it goes against my belief in motorcycles, and remember, motorcycles are a big part of my life.

What does the above bike look like to you?

Remember that a dual-purpose bike is one meant to ride both on the street and in the dirt.

If you're like me, you see a full-on street-only bike in that picture.

In fact, not too long ago, you'd a' been laughed at for even suggesting the bike shown should be ridden off-road because, to people who really want to enjoy dirt riding, it's obscenely big and heavy.

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But, it goes to show how marketing (brainwashing) can change minds.

The above bike is still just a street bike with semi-dirt-bike styling, but people eagerly take to these things and gladly call them adventure bikes.

The only bit of sense I can make out of this kind of bike is that you use it 99% on the street, and take the occasional dirt road.

I think the "adventure" part comes in when you decide to roll the dice and try something that looks a bit rougher, like a bumpy power line road that a 4X4 truck could still take.

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No, the thought of riding that kind of bike will probably never sit well with me, because to me, any time you're off the excellent traction of the pavement and the glass-smooth surface of the pavement, you're simply trying not to crash this adventure bike that's really a street bike.

Where's the fun in that?

And you know what?

I expect that the majority of test riders writing silly review articles for magazines and E-zines that give these bikes good reviews simply turn the blinders on, write a positive article, and expect to keep their jobs.

I'd be curious to know what they believe the truth is, and it's probably something quite different than what they tell you and me in these road test articles, which are really a form of marketing to sell the friggin' bikes to start with.

Don't forget:

Without the motorcycles manufacturer selling bikes and staying in the motorcycle business to start with, the guy doing the article wouldn't have a job there in the first place.

You have to make the manufacturer look reasonably good.

Or else.

Just imagine how much of a B.S. artist the manufacturer rep is.

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It's another drizzly day, so it looks like another drive to work in my clammy-but-trusty Ranger.

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Off to jerk,

-John