More Opinions from the Most Important Opinion Provider in the World: Me

Well, like a giant moron, I forgot to take my old (by today's new today, obsolete next month standards) digicam with me to work yesterday, so most of today's pics are actually from a couple a' days ago.
So, if you don't tell anybody, who's to know, right?
Oooooooh, secrets.
I feel like a politician.
Just don't try blackmailing me, OK?
I don't like blackmail.
I like blue or white mail much better
Easier to read.
Anyway, the above pic is the only one in this post that was actually taken in the past 24 hours.
Ain't I a handsome devil?
And that's with only 5 hours sleep and without any makeup of any kind.
Not even lip balm.
Yes, I know it's amazing, but I don't think it's too conceited of me to allow you bloggers out there a good gawk at me.
I don't mind writing this stuff for (potentially, anyway) anyone in the world to read this stuff and see these pics, either, which is quite amazing in itself because I'm actually the shy and quiet type.
Yes, that's true.
I have always been that way.
I think I inherited that trait from my mother, another shy and quiet person who wouldn't hurt a fly.
In fact, if she were driving down the street and saw a fly hitchhiking, I'm sure she'd stop and give him a ride.
I believe that another reason i turned out that way is because I was the only boy growing up around seven girls.
Yeah, there were eight kids in my family (I'm the second oldest), and seven were girls.
So, you see, that right there should give you a little insight as to why I'm the guy that I am.
I could (and probably will in a future post) go into detail what growing up in this situation was like, but for now, I'll just give you the very brief summary by saying that things were just fine and dandy until we reached puberty.
After that fateful day, we started to realize that we all weren't on the same page anymore, and I don't mean just with the differences of our bodies.
What was important to us and what we liked were also going in different directions.
I mean, how in the hell can Bambi (a year younger than myself) say that she thinks raspberry fingernail polish is better than white?
Huh?
Ridiculous!
Just you remember this, people: White fingernail polish is the shit, OK?
Why?
The high contrast gets you noticed, much like Close Up toothpaste.
I mean, ain't that the No. 1 reason all of you girls out there in Blogland wear it to begin with?
Awwww, c'mon, now.
Don't you try to give me that shit.
I know better than that, so don't you try to pull the wool over my eyes, OK?
I mean, I was experimenting with fingernail polish way before a lot of you were even a fancied thought in your parent's naughty minds, so don't tell me.
Oh, no.
I'm telling YOU.
Yeeeeaaahhh.

Anyway, you know what they say about the shy and quiet ones.
That's right, people - when you least expect it, expect it.
Don't you ever, ever, ever say that I didn't warn you, because if you do, I'll just stick my fingers in my ears and say la-la-la-la for a few minutes. :)


My, my, my.
It's a Yamaha YZF-R1LEZ.
No, that doesn't mean it's a bike built for lesbians.
Sheesh, will you get your collective minds out of the friggin' gutter?
I'm trying to educate you all on motorcycling according to me.
The YZF-R1 part means it's Yamaha's 1,000cc sport bike (I've owned a 1998 and 2002 model), and the LE means it features a quality that makes them call it a Limited Edition, which is the flashy paint and graphics.
The Z on the end is the Yamaha factory's code for 2010 model.
You mean to tell me you didn't know that?
Well, welcome to factory model designations, people.
Get with it.

This bike features what the Yamaha men call the crossplane crankshaft.
This makes the pistons go up and down in an irregular order, and that meand the power strokes come in an irregular order, and I mean irregular compared to other 4-cylindered sportbikes.
What's that all mean?
It means that the Yamaha designers have made a decision, a decision that resulted in something you and I experience all through life:
They made a trade-off.
They traded one thing in exchange for another.
That's right.
Since even these guys who build nice bikes like this can't break the laws of physics, so they had to pick either one or the other, and the one thing they picked was a very linear and controllable power delivery.
That's a very big deal when you're talking about a 1,000cc bike with lots o' power.
The thing they traded away in order to get what they wanted was maximum power.
I think it was a good trade, and the bike sounds friggin' awesome once you install some aftermarket slip-on muffler (or better yet, a whole new exhaust system).

The flashy paint is a replica of Valentino Rossi's works MotoGP bike.
"Works" means a special one-off bike built by the Yamaha factory just for Valentino to ride, and you and I could never buy or ride his bike.
It is THAT special and expensive.
Watch the next MotoGP race that airs on Speed TV a week from this coming Sunday and see for yourself.


That squiggly line is supposed to be Rossi's own signature.
Looks a lot like a seismograph line, doesn't it?
Nice bike, ain't it?


This is the Yamaha WR-250X, a 2010 model, and it's designated WR-250XZ.
This is the the motard version of my own WR-250R.
Motard is a European-derived word for a dirt bike with street bike wheels and tires, even though the roots of this kind of bike originated in the USA.
Back in 1979 I think it was, ABC aired a once-a-year thing called the ABC Superbikers, a race that brought top riders from all kinds of motorcycling together to have a big race on the same track on the came day to see just who and what kind of bike was the top dog.
The motocross bikes that had street-biased tires and a big ol' front brake adapted to it always won the main events, and that is what started this whole motard thing rolling.
Now you know.
It's a fun bike.

The bike to the left is the Suzuki competing model, called the DR-Z400SM, and I owned one of those, too.
I have lots of pics from that bike, and in a future post, you'll see 'em and learn about 'em.


The first blogger out there to leave me a comment and tell me what model bike this is wins a prize.
What's the prize?
Well, you'll just have to guess correctly and find out, won't you?
Jeeezz.
Don't look a gift horse in the mouth, will ya'?
Here's a hint: It's a motorcycle.
There.
That should give you plenty to go on. :)

This is a Yamaha WR-250FY.

The WR-250F means it's Yamaha's 250cc off-road bike, and the Y means it's a 2009 model.

I also own one of these right at this very moment, and I like it very much.

It's the off-road version of Yamaha's rip-roarin' motocross bike called the YZ-250F, and compared to the YZ, it's got some changes to make it better for use out on the trails:

18-inch rear wheel, lights, a speedometer and two odometers, electric starting to go along with the kickstarter, and another trade-off in the power delivery dept. - some top end power has been traded to get some more low end power.

Stock, these bikes are whisper quiet and run like dogs.

The Yamaha factory knows quite well they run like shit straight off the showroom floor, but their hands are tied by completely ridiculous EPA, greening agenda, you-gotta'-help-save-the-freakin'-planet-as-we-tax-the-living-shit-outta'-you-while-you're-doing-it laws.

Stock, the bike is all plugged up with air intake restrictions, lean carburetor settings, and an exhaust muffler that is so muffled, the bike will barely make enough power to do a little pop-a-wheelie.

Hey, any bike that can't wheelie is a crime against humanity.

Yes, you DO know what I'm talking about because I've seen videos on YouTube of you guys out there doing wheelies while taking off from a dead stop with the throttle pinned, so don't give me any of that shit.

OK?

Anyway, once uncorked, this bike runs, basically, like a YZ with a headlight and taillight.

Great fun!

I'm glad I bought it. :)

And now, it's off to jerk.

I mean work.

There, I think I did pretty good with today's extremely informative and only very slightly opinionated post, even though I didn't have any new pics from yesterday to work with.

I've got such talent.

It's a wonder I don't have a big head over it.

Wait a minute...why ain't my old hat fitting...

-John